what the fuck is leo the lion and why can’t i find anything about it on youtube
the subtitles are just a part of the movie and they’re always different from the spoken dialogue
there isn’t even any spoken line here they just wrote this in
the subtitles arent even the weirdest part tho?? like
I dont have enough screencaps to really show how crazy this movie is but yeah
seriously if you have Netflix watch it
Other notable points:
There’s basically no background???
At one point there’s a really loud unexplained midi horn noise and I don’t know why
The narrator seems really out of place like he talks 24/7 in scenes that clearly should have quiet??
They are NOT lying the subtitles are like a completely different script, including paraphrasing and name changes, almost all of which matches up better with the lips than the current audio
Some background monkeys have rasta hats on… it is neither addressed nor explained
The proportions are so weird… it makes me feel unclean all the lions are so unbalanced and sharp and lanky
vaguely sexual elephant cuddling
“that night was filled with…(sultry voice shift) such promise”
elephant wife calls elephant husband daddy
villain elephant is accompanied by radical public-domain guitar tunes
newborn babies can speak full sentences
One motherfucker doing the extra voice in the jungle fire scene is so disinterested in comparison to the rest, i feel his pain, he is me
Antelope suggests they will be safe in The Heart Of The Jungle ™ when the jungle is completely on fire
There’s a song at one point did I mention that
The antelope has dentures, no this is never explained either
I swear to god the voice of the elephant twins is so familiar who is it
ITS FUCKKKI N G DEBI DERRYBERRY
IM ONLY 40 MINUTES IN WH Y IS THER MROE
ITS FROM 2013 AND YET I CAN FIND NEXT TO NOTHING ON IT LIKE ANYWHERE???
Wtf
OKAY
I’D LIKE TO ELABORATE FURTHER ON THIS MOVIE AS I HAVE JUST WATCHED IT I”M LITERALLY CRYING ABOUT IT
I can’t believe what I’ve seen
Leo ends up adopting five children???
Two of them are the queen elephants children who he WITNESSED given BIRTH
They FOLLOW him AWAY from their mother
And he just takes them to the heart of the jungle or as the subtitles called it the Lake of Milk where orphaned children would be taken care of
He LEAVES a baby monkey and baby cheetah to be taken care of by a chameleon
I sense subtext from the baby monkey and cheetah??? I don’t???
The Antelope who suggested they go here in the first place falls in LOVE with the CHAMELEON
And that’s not the worst part
In the midst of all this happening, after the unexplained forest fire Maximus Ele Phante the white elephant (or Zanco as the subtitles said) goes to look for the elephant children
He finds them by tracking five feet of foot prints and just sheer nonsense follows
Maximus “kills” the Antelope (Kobo/Ope) and there’s this lame-ass montage of all the scenes he was in until now
He says some parting words to Leo that are like “We had such great adventures together” and shit like that but the SUBTITLES said “You were a great father and you’d make a great HUSBAND” and I was like wtf cause for a second I was convinced that Ope and Leo were engaged
and then the fuxking chameleon’s like “Nah, this ain’t gonna work” and her head turns into the antelopes head and he comes back to life???? I have no clue what happened
But he YELLS ANGRILY at Leo to go get his damn kids and at this point I’m just rubbing my face
He interrupts the Queen Elephants wedding to Maximus and tells everyone that the white elephant murdered the original king and can’t marry the queen because (as the subtitles so nicely put it) he’s a murderer
Then Leo wins in a 12hr chase around the jungle until Maximus gets tired and the Outsiders (humans) capture him
Absolutely no one helps him or thinks better of this like?? I mean I guess he murdered someone but still this is a kids movie
In the end you find out the narrator wasn’t actually the antelope is was old Leo telling this story to his mutant ELEPHANT-LION CHILDREN
I’M NOT JOKING LOOK
Not only is there one song but several
At the end of the movie there’s a goddamn random-ass song about Leo the Lion being a vegetarian and it’s the most annoying, trippy, bullshit I’ve ever seen in a kids movie
He talks about eating hot-fudge sundaes like a lion has ever heard of that
callanswall 