Not a sidekick

night-sea:

This random thought popped back into my mind this week and I can’t get it out of my head. I remember my friend’s sister saying since I was Asian, I could be the  sidekick to my white friend. I can’t remember the exact context, but all I can remember was that it pissed me off.

I think she mentioned a few shows like Gravity Falls, Phineas&Ferb and the little boy from Indiana Jones. It wasn’t commentary on poc potrayal since she doesn’t have the capacity for that and I know she didn’t have ill intentions, but I haven’t gone from 0 to 60 in a long time.

I’m not anyone’s sidekick. I’m not some 2d character that just pops in to say some stupid catch phrase or is someone that solely exists to check in on my white friend’s life without worries or dreams of my own. In fact, my freaking life story would be amazing background material for an Academy award winning movie.

But it’s just something I’m noticing the more I make friends with other nonwhite people. I tend to be treated better or seen as more of an equal. The problem is usually with white people whose friend circle is predominantly if not all white.And there are a few exceptions such as with my boyfriend and best friend. I do notice that I am treated like their little helper or sidekick or to fulfill their “I’m not racist” quota.  I think it actually does extend from the media.  If it’s a white friend’s group with one other poc, it’s easier to notice how the dynamics change since I can observe on the outside. Especially having lived in Korea and Japan.

It’s more like the poc gets more requests to do things for them compared to the equal give and take relationship. Of course, it’s not like that with either my boyfriend or my best friend, but it doesn’t help that I have to interact with individuals in their lives that treat me like I’m an npc.

I guess in fandom terms, it’s like how the fans treat Bucky and Falcon in Captain America. I’m kind of seen in less human or relatable terms for the mere fact of being nonwhite.